Dedicated to my younger sister. I assume that since you have reached my blog page, you must be my friend or a regular reader of my travelogues. Today be privileged to read about my sibling. It may take few minutes of your time, but it's worth reading.
Due to my strong personal convictions, I would like to say that this article doesn't supports a belief in Dravidian ideology or EVR Periyar's view, but my own feelings as a human being who feels the pain when a pin pricks, who gets cough and common cold when infected and who cries during sorrow.
I haven't disclosed much information about my sister as I wasn't interested in revealing that and it's because she is a girl. We are not siblings by blood, or birth but siblings by choice. We were good friends since childhood since school days and we believed we could be good siblings too. I know her since childhood, then lost in touch with her, but later we became close again in the last decade. I owe this lady a lot-a debt I can't pay back.
Everyone has got problems in life. I have my own problems too. It's always easier to advice, not knowing the gravity of the problem a person is facing. That is the way the present day world is going and that's the way everyone behaves. Any problem's intensity and pain could be felt only when you face it. I also faced it. I am not going to talk about it nor go deep into it, but I want the world to know a few things.
Scenario#1:
My life was in complete shambles. It was not my fault, but I can't blame the world for it and it won't lead me anywhere. Mistakes were done by everyone. It was the beginning of a sorrow phase. By nature, I am kind-hearted, gentle but this was a scenario where even a person like me would lose temper. I was completely justified in my anger. I felt bad to lose in a few things which I haven't even dreamed of losing in my life. I cracked and fell before the whole world. Everyone started to advice me and it hurted me. It was my ill-luck that I lost and it wasn't my mistake, but I paid the prize for it. My sister was different. She was the only person in this whole world who said,"Bro-relax. Please forget it. I know how tough it could be, I understand your pain, people are blinded by their temporary success so they feel they are superior enough to comment about others misery". That was the time where I needed love and attention. I got it through my sibling.
Scenario#2:
There was a time when I was without a job during recession. My family laughed at me. I didn't feel bad, but I was amused at the immaturity of the world. But my sister didn't laugh at me. Neither she adviced me! She just told,"Bro-you are a talented unique person, think about me every time you feel down, after all I am the most important person in your life na ?". I liked that cute SMS which she sent to fire my spirits up.
Scenario#3:
Sometimes I do regret about the past. It doesn't mean that I lack maturity or I need to grow up. The fact is I have faced too many hardship. Someone might say,"Krishna, you are too frustrated or you are young to understand". No one would have handled a scenario better than what I have handled. When it comes to life, few things matter a lot. Those few things are namely people around you and your own luck. If these two things are not in favor of you, then forgot about success in anything in your life. Even Bill Gates would have been a failure and not a billionaire in his corporate life. Anyone who has brains will accept that. Those who don't leave my page right way and please don't come back.
I was in such a scenario many times. But I was still able to smile due to my sibling. Her cute smiles, childish voice, matured thoughts made even my tough,dark gloomy days of sorrow look good. What I needed in life was someone who could give hope of victory during my tough times. She certainly did. She genuinely understood that I was unlucky or rather unfortunate and a victim of injustice. That gave me the courage to fight the odds in life and I certainly did change the tide of the war in my life on my own. During Second World War-2, the USSR or Russia did lose during the intial stages while fighting with Nazi Germany, but the tide did change!
It was always easier to advice sitting under the comfortness of life. We seldom care to know what other person's journey life is all about, but we tend to advice. It's not that I hate advice, but the gravity of the situation was so high, I couldn't take it all on my own. My sister stood with me and only gave hope because that's the only thing I expected. She did nothing else. She didn't do my job, or give me money, or involve in my personal stuffs, but only gave hope. She always had a belief that her brother was a good person and understood the pains I went through.
There is a customary in Indian marriages i.e a sister ties the third knot of mangal sutra at her brother's marriage,which the brother ties over the neck of his bride. The first two knots are tied by the boy with the third knot tied by the sister. I even told my sister,"You have been a great sibling to me, why don't you take this right of being my sister ? You can tie the third knot in my marriage". My sister was not much interested in that and I could judge by the tone in her replies. But I appreciate her liberty in her views. I can understand why she wasn't much interested in volunteering in this.
Possible Reasons:
1. She is not related to me by blood or family.
2. She is not a brahmin, whereas I am one.
3. As she is not related to me, if she ties the knot, my own family members may feel let down for not choosing them and this might be a big problem for me. (She would have feared about my life and mental peace and forfeited it even if she wanted to be a part of this).
4. By birth, she is a modern girl with modern thoughts. She is not much into rituals.
In less than 2 months, I would be celebrating my 26th birthday, completing 25 years! Silver jubilee completion! I am no shy person when it comes to celebrating birthdays and this one being the completion of 25 years, it's always special. I strongly admit that I have handled life the best way it could have been to grow up to a situation where I am now amidst so many problems. Thanks to my "chellam" (favourite) who had played a role in it. I believe that a sibling is one who truly cares and need not be of same blood or from same kin or gothra or caste. I would rather prefer someone who has stood with me during tough times to tie the knot rather than give the right and honor to someone who does it for the namesake just because she shares a relation with me in my family. I don't mean to insult any religious sentiments or rituals here, but certainly words fail here to describe the countless good things my sister did to my life. I didn't share the same umbilical chord through which we took food when we were foetus. We didn't share the same womb. But I respect her so much.
Once I even told her, "Kuzhandhai (means a baby in Tamil language) , if you are not interested forget about the rituals. You need not take part in rituals as a sibling, but you can still perform this in a different way. When I get engaged, I will share my Facebook id and password. After my engagement, you change my status to 'Engaged' from Single and when I get married, you log on to my account again and change my status from 'Engaged' to 'Married'. You have tied the knot !!! How is it ? We can still follow the RITUALS BEYOND THE CASTE BARRIER".
-Krishna Kumar Subramanian
a.k.a Junior KK
A lucky brother to an intelligent sister.
Due to my strong personal convictions, I would like to say that this article doesn't supports a belief in Dravidian ideology or EVR Periyar's view, but my own feelings as a human being who feels the pain when a pin pricks, who gets cough and common cold when infected and who cries during sorrow.
I haven't disclosed much information about my sister as I wasn't interested in revealing that and it's because she is a girl. We are not siblings by blood, or birth but siblings by choice. We were good friends since childhood since school days and we believed we could be good siblings too. I know her since childhood, then lost in touch with her, but later we became close again in the last decade. I owe this lady a lot-a debt I can't pay back.
Everyone has got problems in life. I have my own problems too. It's always easier to advice, not knowing the gravity of the problem a person is facing. That is the way the present day world is going and that's the way everyone behaves. Any problem's intensity and pain could be felt only when you face it. I also faced it. I am not going to talk about it nor go deep into it, but I want the world to know a few things.
Scenario#1:
My life was in complete shambles. It was not my fault, but I can't blame the world for it and it won't lead me anywhere. Mistakes were done by everyone. It was the beginning of a sorrow phase. By nature, I am kind-hearted, gentle but this was a scenario where even a person like me would lose temper. I was completely justified in my anger. I felt bad to lose in a few things which I haven't even dreamed of losing in my life. I cracked and fell before the whole world. Everyone started to advice me and it hurted me. It was my ill-luck that I lost and it wasn't my mistake, but I paid the prize for it. My sister was different. She was the only person in this whole world who said,"Bro-relax. Please forget it. I know how tough it could be, I understand your pain, people are blinded by their temporary success so they feel they are superior enough to comment about others misery". That was the time where I needed love and attention. I got it through my sibling.
Scenario#2:
There was a time when I was without a job during recession. My family laughed at me. I didn't feel bad, but I was amused at the immaturity of the world. But my sister didn't laugh at me. Neither she adviced me! She just told,"Bro-you are a talented unique person, think about me every time you feel down, after all I am the most important person in your life na ?". I liked that cute SMS which she sent to fire my spirits up.
Scenario#3:
Sometimes I do regret about the past. It doesn't mean that I lack maturity or I need to grow up. The fact is I have faced too many hardship. Someone might say,"Krishna, you are too frustrated or you are young to understand". No one would have handled a scenario better than what I have handled. When it comes to life, few things matter a lot. Those few things are namely people around you and your own luck. If these two things are not in favor of you, then forgot about success in anything in your life. Even Bill Gates would have been a failure and not a billionaire in his corporate life. Anyone who has brains will accept that. Those who don't leave my page right way and please don't come back.
I was in such a scenario many times. But I was still able to smile due to my sibling. Her cute smiles, childish voice, matured thoughts made even my tough,dark gloomy days of sorrow look good. What I needed in life was someone who could give hope of victory during my tough times. She certainly did. She genuinely understood that I was unlucky or rather unfortunate and a victim of injustice. That gave me the courage to fight the odds in life and I certainly did change the tide of the war in my life on my own. During Second World War-2, the USSR or Russia did lose during the intial stages while fighting with Nazi Germany, but the tide did change!
It was always easier to advice sitting under the comfortness of life. We seldom care to know what other person's journey life is all about, but we tend to advice. It's not that I hate advice, but the gravity of the situation was so high, I couldn't take it all on my own. My sister stood with me and only gave hope because that's the only thing I expected. She did nothing else. She didn't do my job, or give me money, or involve in my personal stuffs, but only gave hope. She always had a belief that her brother was a good person and understood the pains I went through.
There is a customary in Indian marriages i.e a sister ties the third knot of mangal sutra at her brother's marriage,which the brother ties over the neck of his bride. The first two knots are tied by the boy with the third knot tied by the sister. I even told my sister,"You have been a great sibling to me, why don't you take this right of being my sister ? You can tie the third knot in my marriage". My sister was not much interested in that and I could judge by the tone in her replies. But I appreciate her liberty in her views. I can understand why she wasn't much interested in volunteering in this.
Possible Reasons:
1. She is not related to me by blood or family.
2. She is not a brahmin, whereas I am one.
3. As she is not related to me, if she ties the knot, my own family members may feel let down for not choosing them and this might be a big problem for me. (She would have feared about my life and mental peace and forfeited it even if she wanted to be a part of this).
4. By birth, she is a modern girl with modern thoughts. She is not much into rituals.
In less than 2 months, I would be celebrating my 26th birthday, completing 25 years! Silver jubilee completion! I am no shy person when it comes to celebrating birthdays and this one being the completion of 25 years, it's always special. I strongly admit that I have handled life the best way it could have been to grow up to a situation where I am now amidst so many problems. Thanks to my "chellam" (favourite) who had played a role in it. I believe that a sibling is one who truly cares and need not be of same blood or from same kin or gothra or caste. I would rather prefer someone who has stood with me during tough times to tie the knot rather than give the right and honor to someone who does it for the namesake just because she shares a relation with me in my family. I don't mean to insult any religious sentiments or rituals here, but certainly words fail here to describe the countless good things my sister did to my life. I didn't share the same umbilical chord through which we took food when we were foetus. We didn't share the same womb. But I respect her so much.
Once I even told her, "Kuzhandhai (means a baby in Tamil language) , if you are not interested forget about the rituals. You need not take part in rituals as a sibling, but you can still perform this in a different way. When I get engaged, I will share my Facebook id and password. After my engagement, you change my status to 'Engaged' from Single and when I get married, you log on to my account again and change my status from 'Engaged' to 'Married'. You have tied the knot !!! How is it ? We can still follow the RITUALS BEYOND THE CASTE BARRIER".
-Krishna Kumar Subramanian
a.k.a Junior KK
A lucky brother to an intelligent sister.
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